If It Ain't Broke [Nia]

Sleep had taken him again swiftly, but released him just as easily. Kio's touch was the catalyst. He sighed quietly and shifted in the bed. He brought the bridge of his nose to Kio's back, curled around him, and brushed a loose hand across the handler's skin. It was an intimate gesture that began to feel wrong very quickly. He had meant to kiss the small of Kio's spine, maybe, and hold gently to his hips. He wanted to covet the beautiful thing that had come to him, but he began to have doubts. A few hours ago, it may not have seemed out of place. A little tender for the mood, perhaps, but acceptable. Expected. R'fus let out a rough 'mm' and unfolded out onto his back instead. He heard pink Molly swoop quietly across the room. Her claws clicked against wood as she traveled across the headboard to perch on the post.

R'fus arched his back and stretched out his abdomen and ribcage; yawned. He supposed he didn't feel too bad - it was just like he fell asleep in the wrong position after exerting himself - but it was still a far cry from the absolute bliss that high pleasure afforded him. It made him feeling frighteningly mortal, vulnerable, and old. He was only 36, but he had not necessarily been kind to himself as of late. At least he still had something to hold onto. First, there was his business. Second, whatever it was that kept him fretting about Fe'an. Third, Kio. It was good to know that he could still be wanted, sometimes. And he supposed that it was alright - wanting and being wanted. It worked.

"Morning," he breathed. His hair was a terrible mess when he finally lifted it off the pillow, accented by the darkness under his eyes and the stubble that nearly threatened to be called a beard. He sat up against the cool wood of the headboard and couldn't help but groan a little. Molly's eyes twinkled down at the two of them from where she sat, bright even in the dim glowlight. Any issues she had once had with Kio were long gone. She was getting quite old, too, and was very cynical and indifferent for a firelizard. She yawned, too, and skittered down into R'fus lap where he idly stroked her.

Then, out of the silence, R'fus spoke. "Sorry," he said. He was looking down at Molly, but he meant it for Kio - though, if there was anyone he should have been apologizing to, it should have been Eondith. "I was a real shardin' dimglow yesterday. Feelin' a little too brave. Thought I might've been able to ride it out to the end but," he shook his head, "Ah, well, it was just a real shardin' dim thing to do." Brave enough, almost, to commit to getting clean - but only almost, and maybe it was that part that made him feel so bad. He had hurt himself for no gain, because he was weak and afraid. Great.